Naturally

Jessie and I hadn’t spoken since the argument before our mother’s funeral.

“It’s ridiculous!” Jessie’s concern was more for her own reputation than our recently deceased mother’s.

“Of course it’s ridiculous, but it’s Mother’s last wish. I have to honor her request.”

“Which makes you ridiculous. I’m not coming to the funeral. I want no part of this.”

So Mother was buried in her pajamas, bathrobe and slippers.

Now, five years down the road, Jessie made sure I’d honor her wishes. She’d specified her burial attire in her will, as well as the wording for her tombstone: “Au Naturel”

This is a response to the 100 word challenge put forth by Velvet Verbosity. “Honor”

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Practice, practice, practice…and the benefits of regular exercise

If you’ve followed my exercise saga you know that last year I transitioned from Richard Simmons to Wii Fit Plus to power-walking/jogging/running and ultimately to the P90X workout regimen. Then, in September, an injury and subsequent tumble off the exercise-wagon gave me a bad case of couchpotatoitis. Travel and holidays and conflicting demands on my time, as well as a reluctance to dive back into the P90X all-out time commitment, contributed to my putting off any serious renewal of an exercise routine.

This year, my workout efforts are stumbling along in fits and starts; an hour here, 30 minutes there. As part of my 3 Words for 2011 and my goals defined for this year I decided that 4 hours per week should be sufficient to move me toward my fitness goals and to maintain some balance in my life. This week (the last week in January) is the first time I’ve met the 4-hour goal.

I know P90X is a great way to get in shape (such as the notable P90X devotee in congress that a friend highlighted for me). I know I was making fabulous progress toward my goals when I was exercising an hour to an hour and a half every day and strictly adhering to the P90X routine, but the trade-offs were high. I sacrificed the time available for reading & writing and that’s not acceptable. But sitting around on an expanding tush isn’t acceptable either.

Just as November’s novel-writing effort required tremendous determination to push through the resistance of inertia brought on by a long spell of not writing, getting back into the swing of writing & exercising and having the discipline to set my own routine for reading, writing and using the P90X workouts is requiring determination. But I am not giving up. I will stick with my goals and commitments. I will practice discipline and I will benefit.

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Regrets

I’d have told anyone who asked it was harmless. The ads and posters touting the dangers had nothing to do with me. I was fifteen.

From my first drag I was addicted. A pack of cigarettes cost less than a dollar. Smoking bans were barely a twinkle in some legislator’s eye. I sat in a restaurant and drew in the poison. I exhaled slowly, watching the smoke rise, loving the new me. On that day I became a smoker.

Forty years later I sit in the stink, stains and ashes that cover my life, wishing I’d heeded the warnings.

This is a response to the 100 word challenge put forth by Velvet Verbosity.

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My 3 words and the goals that go with them

This year I was introduced to the concept of identifying 3 words to be the focus and guide for personal goals and development, rather than going through the exercise of creating resolutions that might fall to the wayside before the end of January. I wrote about how I came to my 3 words here.

For 2011, my words are: Prudence, Mercy, Humility

Prudence = the characteristic of exercising sound judgment in practical affairs; act justly.

Mercy = a disposition to be kind and forgiving; compassionate treatment of others; a blessing

Humility = the quality of being modest, reverential, never rude or self-abasing; temperance (restraint against inordinate desires or appetites).

As January nears its end I’m pleasantly surprised to realize these 3 words continue to resonate for me. But the real trick is to define SMART goals that support these words. SMART goals that are Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant and Time-bound. I’m sharing my goals here as an example and as a way to hold myself accountable.

  1. Exercise 4 hours per week
  2. Write a minimum of 4 blog posts per week (one each: Here, Here, Here &  Here)
  3. Read one leadership book per month, write a one-page summary for reference and share the content/learnings with my staff
  4. Save $5/week from my lunch allowance to give away in unexpected places in December
  5. Read/review one novel per month
I’m not off to a great start but I’m making progress and I’m not giving up.
Have you set goals or made resolutions for 2011? If so, how are you doing so far?
Posted in discipline, life, love, mature, Tips for Better Living, trust, Wisdom, Writing | 1 Comment

Mystery Dance

When I arrived at the scene no one seemed interested in checking my credentials so I kept my wallet in the pocket of my coat.

As more officers, the coroner and the detective in charge arrived they focused on the corpse; no one gave me a second glance. I remained in the background, observing and considering my options. My only lead, now a dead end, pale and still against a colorful palette of fallen leaves.

The body, daylight and my last hope disappeared about the same time. I humbly approached the detective seeking pity and a possible clue.

This is a response to the 100 word challenge put forth by Velvet Verbosity.

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According to one who knows

Mary waited patiently while her friend’s sobs subsided. She patted her back and rubbed her shoulders, making soothing noises and saying things like “there, there.” After a while, Sue’s breathing slowed, with only the occasional hiccup breaking through as she regained her composure.

“I don’t know what I’m going to do,” Sue said. “How can I go on?”

“Don’t worry, honey. You’ll be fine. No matter what anyone else tells you, you can take it from me. You know I’ve got the credentials: three attorneys and seven ex-husbands. There most certainly is life after divorce.”

This is a response to the 100 word challenge put forth by Velvet Verbosity.

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Waiting

Margaret sits in the waiting room, alone with her thoughts. The events of this morning, looping in her mind like a tragic news clip, solely hers to witness.

“Mama! I’m imbisible!”

With less than a second’s consideration she’d responded, “You mean ‘invincible’.”

“Yeah!” said her son, her precious dare-devil, only child, wearing last Halloween’s superman costume, now too small, with torn elbows and shredded knees. “I’m IN-VINCIBLE!” pronounced so carefully.

With a shout he was off again. She was grateful for the opportunity to focus on her work.

Now, guilt infuses her waiting. Five year olds are not invincible.

This 100 word challenge post.

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A Tale About Trolls

Once upon a time, in a land that might or might not be far, far away, there lived a troll. This troll, like any troll, had “issues”, not the least of which is her overwhelming anger. Sure she had friends she could growl with, but it wasn’t enough to satisfy the pain in her heart.

One day she happened to find the house of someone she could hate. She knew a little bit about this person and it was enough. She settled in under their porch and prepared herself for a good time.

She anticipated so much fun she invited over some friends. They took turns leaving angry, nasty comments for the homeowner to find. But something went horribly wrong for them. For two weeks, nothing happened! They felt neither rewarded nor relieved.

The troll soon realized the homeowner’s sister’s address was posted proudly on the wall so she crept over and hid under the unsuspecting sister’s porch. What the troll didn’t seem to realize was that the sister’s home welcomes anyone exploring their faith or (and this is the good part) for anyone looking to learn from the many mistakes she made in raising her children.

The troll spent some time exploring the home, and maybe she thought she had all the ammunition she needed when she launched her first round. But alas, shouting recriminations about poor parenting skills or poking at her faith…it made the sister chuckle.

“Why ‘yes’!” the sister admitted, “You’re right! I’m not perfect, by far. I’ve made many mistakes. I’ve wept many a tear and I’ve learned a lot. I’ve grown stronger but more importantly I’ve grown closer to God. Through my trials I’ve developed a deeper faith. Please, come in and stay a while. I’d like to hear more about your experiences. You’re welcome any time you want; I love to talk about my faith. You don’t have to agree with me. I appreciate the company and the opportunity to explore and share!”

I’m not sure how this story ends. You tell me….

Dear Lord, I pray for people who feel the need to criticize and be negative in a world already filled with pain and sorrow. Bless us as we strive to do our best, by Your grace. Help us all to love one another as You have commanded us. Amen.

Posted in adulthood, angst, child-rearing, children, discipline, faith, family, Is it just me?, life, love, mature, prayer, Tips for Better Living, trust, Wisdom | 2 Comments

The Board

Rodie takes a deep breath, steeling himself for the climb. One foot after the other, one rung at a time, he ascends. At the top he steps forward. A skinny boy in bright trunks, he moves cautiously between rails. Past the rails, he takes five steps to the board’s end. He draws another deep breath, looking down….

Today Rodie stands in a cold room, recalling the day he stood 3 meters above the community pool and conquered fear that stabbed through him like a knife. He turns to the seven men sitting before him, breathes deeply and smiles.

This was *intended* to be a submission to Velvet Verbosity’s 100 Word challenge for this week but I appear to be off-cadence. Alas. Maybe next time.

Posted in 100 words, Fiction | 2 Comments

Three Words for 2011 (and insight into how my mind works)

Sure, I’d heard a bit of the buzz…but amidst all of the noise and fanfare of the incoming new year I’d not stopped to discern just what was that buzzing noise I was hearing about “3 words”. Then a friend e-mailed me and mentioned her own pursuit of the 3 words that would be her focus for 2011 so I finally stopped and listened.

I read Chris Brogen’s post on the subject. I read the three words chosen by him and by others (in Chris’ comments and here and here). I sent Chris Brogen’s link to my staff and challenged them to come up with their own 3 words and to make sure their goals supported their 3 words. But I still couldn’t seem to come up with my own three words. My thinking went something like this:
“Focus” should be one of the words because I really need to stay focused, but that seems silly because the words are supposed to be the focus. I can’t focus on focus. What would be my goals? Be less ADD? Sit still for at least 5 minutes before succumbing to interruption and distraction?
“Faith” doesn’t need to be one of the words because I’m blessed with a deep, abiding faith these days (although Lord knows it is often tested).
Maybe “Boundaries” should be on the list. I tend to work way too many hours and not leave enough time for the things (and people) I love. Really it’s a matter of “balance”. Yes, “balance” should be one of the words. I can measure my days and assess how well I’m maintaining balance. My to-do lists, my calendar, my e-mail all reflect the balance (or lack thereof) in my life.
But what else? Maybe “focus”. I don’t stay focused very well. But I’ve already considered & discarded that one. Hmmm.
“Discern”? I often pray for discernment, so that I can know God’s will. “Obey”? Once I feel guided, am I obedient? “Act”? Do I act according to God’s desires for me? Do I understand God’s purpose and plan for me? Do I follow where he leads me?
All through the day yesterday and today I wrestled with distilling all of this down to three words. Three little words (or big words) that will have meaning for me. Three words that will help me stay focused on my goals. Three words that are better than any meaningless resolution. I tried on other people’s words but nothing seemed to fit.
Meanwhile, on the radio, on the internet, at church, amongst friends I keep hearing talk of change. It’s that time of year. But I don’t really want change per se. I just want to stay focused on the things that matter.
Finally, Micah 6:8 resonated from the pages of the chronological Bible I’m reading. God has shown me what he requires of me: to act justly, to love mercy and to walk humbly with God.
So after spending a little more time thinking about the words that will help me stay focused on what God wants of me, here’s my list:
Prudence, Mercy, Humility
Prudence = the characteristic of exercising sound judgment in practical affairs; act justly.
Mercy = a disposition to be kind and forgiving; compassionate treatment of others; a blessing
Humility = the quality of being modest, reverential, never rude or self-abasing; temperance (restraint against inordinate desires or appetites).
So, yes, some change will be required. Ultimately I think these 3 words capture a life of discernment and obedience with the necessary element of humility … which will honestly require the greatest effort of the three.
May God bless me this year. May God bless us all.
What are your three words?
Posted in adulthood, discipline, faith, life, love, prayer, Tips for Better Living, trust, Wants, Writing | 6 Comments