Café Chat April 11th

Posted on April 11, 2009 by Fran Hart
Today’s topic:

If you referred to Philippians 4:8 as a standard, would there be something or some situation you would stop doing, or give up completely? (Or at least begin trying to change with the Lord’s help as I am with the situation I discussed today). As always, specifics are great, but feel free to use generalities.

“And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise. “ Philippians 4:8

My challenge is that I tend to say what I think thereby revealing an unkind streak. “Some people make cutting remarks, but the words of the wise bring healing.” Proverbs 12:18

So, if I were fixing my thoughts on not just the truth, but the honorable truth, eliminating thoughts that are not lovely, not admirable, then I would not find myself occasionally apologizing for things I’ve said.

A coworker accused me of “torpedoing him” during a recent meeting (a few directors and a dozen underlings were also in attendance). He then gave me a verbal smackdown. Since I was right in my position, one of the directors proceeded to lambaste him (on the point I was making, not for the smackdown). I spent a few minutes looking angelic while he got a dressing down. I spoke the truth. I was right. But I was not honorable and the point I was making – certainly not worthy of praise.

If I could have a do-over, I would have followed up with him after the meeting. Even if that path took more effort on my part, at least no apology or smoothing of ruffled feathers would be required. This is definitely something I need to address in myself.

It’s not just about being true and right, but the focus is on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. I think that if I run my thoughts through that checklist before I speak, I will reflect the wisdom of Proverbs 12:18. How much better to heal than to cut? Better to say nothing than to wound someone with my words.

Praise God, let Your will be done.
Amen.

About Fran Hart

Disciple of Christ, earning a living as the director of US-based operations for a Taiwanese company, managing an engineering organization while carving out time to write. Wife, Mother, Grandmother.
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2 Responses to Café Chat April 11th

  1. Toknowhim says:
    April 12, 2009 at 3:00 am

    What a story… So cool how you applied that 🙂

    Blessings, Kim

  2. Nichols says:
    April 13, 2009 at 1:17 pm

    As Micah 6:8 says – What does the Lord require of you? To seek justice, love kindness, and walk humbly with your God.

    Or as the message says:

    Micah 6:8 (The Message)

    But he’s already made it plain how to live, what to do, what God is looking for in men and women.
    It’s quite simple: Do what is fair and just to your neighbor, be compassionate and loyal in your love, And don’t take yourself too seriously— take God seriously.

    I quite often find this verse rolling around my head when I get self righteous. I find it helps me to love kindness, and to not take my self too seriously 🙂

    Grace and Peace – Em.

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