It was inevitable. He’s 16. He can’t help himself. He must transition from child to adult. Unlike a caterpillar whose transition allows them the comfort of a cocoon to effectively insulate them from the world, teens must go out into the world and face the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune. And worse, other teens. And teachers. And police officers who pull them over and issue citations (but that I’ll save for another post).
What’s a mother to do?
Love, love, love! And when that’s not enough, love them some more.
I’ve had to remind myself of this lately. When my teen comes home tired and cranky, I need to offer love. When he tries to reject my love, I need to offer more love.
How?
I write him notes that tell him I love him. I communicate with him (about my day, about his day, about his dreams and plans). I do things for him (“Are you hungry? Can I fix you a sandwich?”). I encourage him (“Wow! That’s great! You’re really doing a good job.). I pat him on the back (literally).
This post is as much for me as for you. The rewards of this sacrifice are not immediately evident. My love can easily be rebuffed or rejected. But I am determined to respond with MORE not less. I’ve learned this lesson the hard way.
Ah, well, but then I was 'sent' to read this, too, for me. 😉
Thanks!
Barbara
Barbara "TherExtras" told me I should stop by and ask you about your fish – I blogged about mine yesterday at http://keepgoingyoufool.blogspot.com
Nice to meet you!
Hey, You Two, see this post where a blogger-mom commits to writing a book:
http://carrielink.blogspot.com/2010/08/selfish.html
(Hoping Jane subscribed to the comments here.)
Barbara
Yes, I did subscribe to comments, so thanks for the link.
You do have to be selfish to write. I am constantly torn between building up my writing business and writing for myself. I really need a fairy godmother to run my life while I go on a six-month retreat. Sigh.